Breathing Space

When was the last time what you said was misinterpreted? What was the impact?

A coaching client told a member of his team months ago that he didn’t have time right now to look at something for them. He was overloaded. His intent was to have the person bring it to him later in the day. He was mortified to find that months later the team member thought he meant, “I don’t care about your problems or workload - deal with them yourself.” He wasn’t aware of the impact until he had to intervene in a problem that couldn’t be solved by the team member alone.

It’s a great example of how easily psychological safety can be damaged. Even though he and the team member have discussed it and reset, it will take a while before she feels entirely comfortable bringing problems forward. A lot is riding on his reactions to the first few.

In my latest book (Un)shakeable, one of the leaders I interviewed passed on a lesson from a mentor who was head of MI5 in the Middle East during a significant conflict. The essence of the advice was:

“You always have at least a minute to think (if not, it’s probably a ‘duck for cover’ situation). A minute may not seem like enough, but run a stopwatch. 60 seconds is a decent amount of time to think if it’s used well. And the minute you spend thinking will have a greater impact on the outcome than taking immediate action.”

Creating breathing space like that, especially when you and your team are under serious pressure, is a great way to reduce actions that damage the psychological safety of the team.

How can you create breathing space in your day?